My journey into a dairy-free lifestyle did not happen because I decided I wanted to be a typical millennial and have random dietary restrictions because it sounded cool. This is something that I have been forced into because my digestive track decided that, after 23 years, it was no longer going to tolerate dairy and possibly shell fish. It has been a really emotional experience that caused many tears, allergy tests, and living in the bathroom.
If I am being honest, after living in Spain and coming back, I had a hard time processing dairy. It would make me feel bloated but never made me sick to the point that I was willing to stop eating it in general. I did make the switch to dairy free milk and that seemed to be good enough. I would eat cheese in moderation and I was doing fine.
Now, let's fast forward to 6 weeks before our wedding. I decided that I really wanted Kroger brand chocolate milk while we played board games. Bad choice. I was violently ill to the point that I was concerned I would have to live in the bathroom. I gained +8lbs of bloat and my stomach was huge! (I am not skinny...but I looked pregnant). I was also experiencing massive amounts of anxiety. I was experiencing panic attacks because I was afraid of my future husband or I dying before our wedding. I was terrified to drive or go anywhere without him. After our wedding, things were not getting better and my anxiety transferred to my job. I was still dairy free and I was experiencing stomach issues because of my anxiety about going to work/dying. I decided to meet with my doctor and start anti-anxiety medication. After I adjusted to my medication, my stomach issues went away and my anxiety became manageable again. I chose to reintroduce cheese back into my diet. I wasn't experiencing any issues and I thought I was good to go!
The next time that I experienced issues was Valentine's Day weekend. We went to our favorite restaurant and I ordered a seafood dish and churros with chocolate. That night, I was so sick that I thought my husband was going to need to take me to the hospital. We chalked it up to bad clams/scallops and I tried to get better. Once I was better, I was eating normally again but would randomly throw up after certain meals about an hour after I would eat. I started to track my food to see if there was a trend. The only common denominator was DAIRY! The only way that we were going to know if that was the issue was to do an elimination diet again and then try to reintroduce it again.The night that I ate dairy again, I ended up in the hospital because my throat was closing and my skin felt like it was on fire. It was clear that I could no longer eat it. The doctor at the hospital recommended allergy testing.
I went to get allergy testing and my results came back negative for everything...which meant that the test wasn't valid and my body was still producing histamine from a previous allergic reaction. I sobbed to the doctor and begged for more answers. I felt defeated. She validated my feelings and promised she would help me get more answers. She said that I needed to see a gastroenterologist and get blood work done. I needed to continue to eliminate all dairy and track my meals in the mean time. The next day, Ohio received its first positive COVID-19 case and my hopes of getting into a GI doctor and getting blood work lessened each day. Luckily, I was figuring out what I could / could not eat and was okay with waiting.
The process of eliminating dairy was overwhelming. It included a lot of trial and error as well. I learned that "lactose-free" products still include milk proteins that I cannot have. I learned that certain nitrites//nitrates cause me to be sick which are found in some processed meat products, as well as wine. There were a lot of tears involved and feeling really alone. I was getting jealous of my husband for being able to eat what he wanted and I was embarrassed because I was vomiting so much. I was terrified to eat out at restaurants because I didn't want to get sick in public. Our lives were being disrupted and it was my fault. This wasn't how I wanted to remember our first year of marriage! (I had no idea what COVID-19 would bring...we will really never forget it now.) I am so blessed that my husband was so supportive during this time and was willing to try anything and everything.
On a positive note, after a month of trial and error I have found great alternatives to most of the dairy products that I love (which I will write about) and ways to make our favorite meals dairy free. I don't feel like I am missing out on my favorite foods anymore (except charcuterie boards). I learned how to read nutrition labels better which has benefitted my family's overall health. I am writing this blog to help share my journey and to hopefully make someone else's easier. I am so thankful for all of the people who shared their experience with me and I hope that I can do the same for someone else!
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